Not everyone is going to like you. And they will express it (not to you most of the time). One of those lessons in life that is kind of hard to swallow when you know that you are fabulous motherfucking sorcerer. You can say that you don’t give a fuck what other people think, and maybe you are one of those lucky people who really don’t give a fuck. Or maybe you’re on pills so you literally can’t give a fuck because your default feeling is nonchalant. But if you aren’t on pills, and you do give a fuck and all you feel like you can do is repeat that Kanye West-ish (I assume) mantra “haters gonna hate”, then you must be pretty bummed because deep down you know that most people who say “haters gonna hate” sound like douchebags.
If you’re a total psycho, like me, you probably get kind of pissed off when you hear that someone is talking about you. I actually have a reaction, no matter how hard I try not to. I repeat to myself in a self-help books on tape monotone voice “Not everyone is going to like you, and that’s okay”. I almost always have to confront the person who talks about me even though I know that it’s very likely they are going to lie and nothing will come of it. It just makes me feel better and if something will make you feel better in life, without hurting someone else, I am all for it. But then there are those situations when you are told not to confront someone by the messenger. Which is probably the greatest first world problem ever. When a friend says “If I tell you something, promise you won’t say anything?”. It’s like, obviously now I have to make a promise that I could potentially break based on what you are about to tell me and that alone pisses me off. It’s like, if you care that the person talking about me is going to get mad at you for telling me, then why are you telling me? Why aren’t you off talking about me with the person doing the talking because you obviously don’t care enough about me to let me confront this person if I want to. You follow me?
What confuses me about people not liking me or another person is that in order for me to not like someone, my life needs to somehow have been inconvenienced by someone for me to not like them. Example: Last year I got pissed off on 4th of July because some chick banned me from a cookout at a mutual friend’s house because I had written a blog condemning her for bringing Stop & Shop brand hotdogs to my cookout. In my defense, I had written the blog after hearing she had called me and my friends white trash. I guess in the eyes of a girl from Hingham, we are ripping white trash. But as someone not from Hingham, I think I’m classy as fuck. But back to my point. If I saw this girl now, or even a month after she banned me from the cookout, I would be totally indifferent to her. Because I stopped giving a fuck about her the day after the cookout. My plan for 4th of July was changed and it was out of my control and I didn’t like that. But I literally can’t not like someone for that long because it takes energy away from me and alters my life even longer than the duration of some whack ass cookout with meat that is not up to par. As someone who has self-induced chronic fatigue for staying up on the internet too late at night, I need that energy to get through my day without setting myself on fire. So in order to stay somewhat content, I try not to spend my time disliking someone. And if you don’t dislike someone, you don’t need to talk about them. The exception to this is when someone is jealous of you. They don’t have to dislike you to be jealous. They just need to hear that you have something that they don’t have to talk about you. So in my egotistical mind, either you don’t like me because you are investing your own energy into disliking me and you are resentful that I am altering your life in that manner, OR you are jealous of me. When I am talking about someone else, it’s because they have fucked up a period of my time, or because I am jealous that they have something I do not have, which is a normal feeling that happens even if you don’t want it to. When someone is talking about me, I spend a period of time wondering why. And spending a period of time that I could have used to catch up on celebrity gossip on things like asking myself why someone was talking about me stresses me out because I know I shouldn’t care about someone who just possibly wants something that I have that they don’t. So I repeat to myself that not everyone is going to like me, and they are going to talk about it to whoever will listen, and unless someone wants to fuck up a period of my day by telling me about it, I probably won’t find out about it because I’m off somewhere being a fabulous motherfucking sorcerer.
The first point to this unnecessarily long blog is to say that it’s normal to give a fuck if someone doesn’t like you or if someone talks about you. It’s ideal to not give a fuck. If you don’t give a fuck because you are on pills, it’s science. People will tell you not to give a fuck or waste your time wondering, but that probably won’t matter. Just repeat to yourself that not everyone is going to like you and go on with your day because behavior becomes abnormal when you dwell. If it will make you feel better and makes you stop dwelling, confront the person with the expectation that it won’t do anything to change this person’s opinion of you and they will probably lie about it because some humans have the tendency to be pussies when put under pressure. You should do anything that makes you feel a little better as long as you are not hurting someone else. Example: The second point to this unnecessarily long blog was to confront the girl who was talking about me this weekend. I know what you said. And I’m sorry you’re jealous of me. Ahhh, I feel better now. The third and most important point to this unnecessarily long blog is to say that no matter what other people say or think about you, you are still fabulous. Unless you aren’t. Either way, stop dwelling.
I typed the word “pussies”. Ew.